How ordinary routines, community and laughter helped Stephen rebuild his life after 17 years of heroin addiction
Stephen, a Reading community resident at Hope and Vision Communities, tells us about his unexpected journey into addiction, his experience of rehab, and the gradual process of rebuilding his life.

Addiction can happen to anybody, even people whose lives seem far removed from what we might imagine an “addict” to look like. Stephen is one of those people.

At 35, Stephen had served for nine years in the Army and was due to go to Iraq when a knee injury meant he had to leave the forces. Being active had always been a huge part of his life, and suddenly he couldn’t move around like he had before.

“I just think something snapped in me. I couldn’t cope with not being able to move around because of my bad leg,” Stephen tells me. “It was painful mentally, rather than physically.”

One night, while visiting a friend who was struggling with his own problems, Stephen was offered heroin. His friend told him it would “take the edge off”. Until that point, Stephen had never considered taking hard drugs, he hadn’t even tried party drugs. He thought he would try it once. Instead, it became a 17-year addiction.

“It became a way of relieving the mental anxiety and the mental pain,” he says.

For years, Stephen tried to stop using heroin by himself. He had always been independent and self-reliant, and believed that if he could get himself into addiction, he should be able to get himself out. But he couldn't maintain it on his own.

Eventually, he realised that the life he had built around him meant little if he couldn't escape his addiction. He decided to seek professional help and entered Yeldall Manor. Some people had told Stephen that going into rehab would be one of the hardest things he had ever done. His experience was very different.

“I couldn’t wait to get through the door,” he says. “The minute I got in there, I thought, ‘Right, this is it. I’m safe here.’”

Stephen spent six months in the main house and another six months in the lodge before beginning the gradual process of returning to everyday life. He volunteered for around 18 months before finding paid work.

“It took a long time,” he says, “but I feel like I’m gradually coming back down to earth on a really smooth trajectory.”

There is a common misconception that rehab fixes everything instantly, that once someone completes treatment, their life simply returns to how it was before, just without the drugs. The reality is much more complicated.

Before entering rehab, Stephen had to give up his flat and his car. So, when he completed treatment, he was essentially starting again. That was where Hope and Vision Communities became an important part of his recovery.

“I was totally reliant on Hope and Vision when I came out of rehab. I really don’t know where I would have gone,” Stephen says. “Without them, I don’t know what I would have done.”

Having a secure, long-term place to live gave Stephen something that had been missing: certainty. He explains that when you're living somewhere with a fixed end date, it can be difficult to put down roots or make plans for the future.

“If it was always in the back of your mind that you only had six months, you wouldn’t want to lay any foundations or make long-term plans.” he says.

Hope and Vision gave him the opportunity to settle.

“It gives you confidence to just get on with life and make plans,” he says. “Knowing that you’re going to be there gives you that peace of mind. You can settle, and it helps you feel more settled mentally.”

That stability has given Stephen the space to rebuild his life gradually. Finding work, developing relationships, becoming part of his local community and beginning to think about what might come next.

He now works 25 hours a week and gets on well with his colleagues. He likes his job and is learning new skills.

Outside work, life is relatively quiet, and that's something he likes. He goes running, sometimes covering several miles, and occasionally goes for long walks with friends. He attends a local church and volunteers at its food bank.

Whilst living at one of Hope and Vision’s Reading-based properties, Stephen has been able to connect with his neighbours. The sense of community he feels shows in the way he talks about them. One family has young boys who he sometimes plays football with at the nearby park. And after work on a Friday, he sometimes brings cake and biscuits home to share with his community.

“They’re very neighbour-ly. People look out for each other here,” he says.

These might sound like small things, but for Stephen they represent something much bigger.

During his addiction, he felt isolated from the people around him. Recovery has brought him back into relationships with other people, both those who understand what he has been through and those who are simply part of everyday life.

“Being around people who are going through something similar,” he says. “Just being around all positive people. It rubs off on you.”

And perhaps one of the simplest signs of how much has changed is laughter. Stephen remembers how, during his addiction, he became emotionally numb. Even at his mother's funeral, he says, he struggled to feel anything. He says “I was just numb for every feeling.”

In recovery, he rediscovered the ability to laugh, like proper belly laugh. “When you go through the withdrawals and start belly laughing and having a joke, which you haven’t done for years, you realise how much you’ve been missing.” he says. That sense of connection and shared joy is at the heart of what community can offer.

Stephen's recovery has not been a sudden transformation. It has been gradual. From rehab to volunteering to work, to finding secure housing, relationships, community and the slow rebuilding of confidence.

And now, for the first time in many years, he is looking towards the future. He doesn't know exactly what that future will look like. In fact, that's the one thing that still niggles at him. But it's a good thing.

“I’m sort of like an open book. I’m looking forward to the future.”

There is something waiting around the corner, Stephen feels. He just doesn't know what it is yet.

That is a big change from the mindset he had during his addiction. Before leaving for rehab, his brother had warned him that if he didn't stop using, he might not make it to Christmas.

Stephen's response at the time was sad but matter-of-fact: “Brilliant, I’ve got four months left.”

Today, he is looking forward to having a future at all. And perhaps that's what makes Stephen's story so powerful. Recovery isn't always about dramatic moments. Sometimes, it is about having somewhere safe to come home to. Going for a walk with a friend. Going to work. Playing football with the neighbours. Sharing food. Finding community. And, after years of feeling numb, having a proper belly laugh again.

It is these ordinary things that helped Stephen find his second chance at life, and we are excited about where it takes him next.